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Forced Marriage in Britain: When Does Tradition Cross the Line Into Abuse?
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A survivor’s testimony shows how choosing freedom can mean losing family, identity and a place to belong
The testimony of forced-marriage survivor Shaheen Hashmat has once again brought an uncomfortable question into public view: where should society draw the line between respecting religious or cultural traditions and protecting an individual's fundamental right to choose whom — or whether — they marry? Hashmat has spoken about leaving her family home in Scotland at just 12 after fearing she could face the same fate as her older sisters. But escaping was not simply a matter of walking through a door. It meant walking away from family, familiarity and almost everything she knew, with the frightening reality of having no obvious place to belong. She has described the emotional cost of that separation and has since spoken of having a relationship with one of her sisters — a reminder that survival can come with consequences that last long after someone reaches safety.
Watch Shaheen Hashmat's Full Interview Below
That sense of alienation deserves greater attention. Forced marriage may be an extreme manifestation of control, but the wider conflict between personal freedom, family expectations, religion and culture reaches far beyond one community or faith. Across different backgrounds, people can find themselves rejected, ostracised or pressured when their choice of partner, lifestyle or direction in life does not meet the expectations of those closest to them. For some, saying no can mean losing parents, siblings, community and an entire support network. It raises a profoundly human question: is a person's life theirs to live, or should they be expected to sacrifice their own happiness to satisfy the people around them?
The figures show why the distinction between tradition and coercion matters. In 2025, the UK's Forced Marriage Unit provided tailored assistance in 406 cases involving possible forced marriage and/or female genital mutilation. Some 40 per cent involved people aged 17 or younger, while 74 per cent involved female victims. Fifty-eight cases had no overseas element, demonstrating that this is not simply something happening beyond Britain's borders. Importantly, forced marriage should not be confused with an arranged marriage entered into freely by two consenting adults. Nor should the issue be attributed to one religion or culture. The question becomes far more difficult when family expectations turn into intimidation, emotional pressure, threats or the removal of someone's ability to choose.
British law recognises that boundary: forcing somebody into marriage is a criminal offence, and protections for children have been strengthened so that causing someone under 18 to marry can itself constitute an offence. But laws cannot erase the emotional devastation of choosing between personal freedom and the people who raised you. Respect for religion and culture remains an important part of a diverse society, but no tradition should require a woman — or anyone else — to surrender control over their own future. Perhaps the debate should not be about forcing religions or cultures to change, but challenging practices wherever they create victims and cycles of coercion. When maintaining a tradition requires someone else to give up their freedom, their relationships and sometimes their family, whose life are they really being asked to live — their own, or everybody else's?